I had some dreams ... they were klowns in my koffee.


(With apologies to Carly Simon)


This is my journey through job transition from a toxic environment to a better life. Join me for a few thoughts and a few laughs along the way.
What are "klowns in my koffee"? They are the factors large and small that make you less than you are. A "klown" can be a grossly incompetent boss,
a short-sighted policy or a moronic coworker. They won't kill you, at least not immediately, but they abrade the soul
as you scrape past them to get through the day. Sometimes it's best to dump them out of the cup.


Monday

Day 107 - 401Klown

Day Kup (What I Did On My Reality Vacation)
I spent a few hours this morning in the office of my financial advisor. They have done a terrific job consolidating my 401K's. Unfortunately, there is an idiot transfer company holding a stock certificate of mine hostage. This is round three of the battle and they may be starting to weaken, thanks to the amiable and appropriately sharp-tongued woman at Edward Jones. I'm owed a call back from my original 401K company by Thursday so they can explain why they had their supplier put my stock in my broker's name and in a type of account that I can't do anything with without tax issues. That company truly invokes the 'klown' epithet. Talking with them is like a random response generator.

Me: "I need your help in resolving this problem and successfully rolling my stock over." Them: "Brussels sprouts." Me: (eyes dart in confusion, forehead furrows)

I've gotten better answers from a Magic 8 ball.

After that, Attila the Son and I journeyed to the mecca of Home Depot to gather a bounty of paint swatches. Overcoming inertia and T's interest in house exterior colors usually reserved for model railroad villages, we settled on Harvest Brown (which just edged out Koala Bear despite the cutesy name), trim color Painter's White (less blue than White white but not a cream), and accent color Morocco Red (a deep red with brown and orange undertones).

Catering to suspicions that I'm channeling my late grandmother, I baked a loaf of wheat bread. Then, remembering that I am me, I took the breadmaker all apart to figure out what was wrong with the drive belt.

Good to the Last Drop
Another surreal Craigslist ad:
Could you use a fake flat screen TV (about 48-50")? Use it to stage a house, in a theater production, as a practical joke. It comes in a metal frame and stands up by itself. It came with an entertainment center on accident. Please save it from the dumpster.

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