I had some dreams ... they were klowns in my koffee.

(With apologies to Carly Simon)

This is my journey through job transition from a toxic environment to a better life. Join me for a few thoughts and a few laughs along the way.
What are "klowns in my koffee"? They are the factors large and small that make you less than you are. A "klown" can be a grossly incompetent boss,
a short-sighted policy or a moronic coworker. They won't kill you, at least not immediately, but they abrade the soul
as you scrape past them to get through the day. Sometimes it's best to dump them out of the cup.


Day 27 - I wouldn't want to belong to a club...

What did I do today and what did I learn?

-- I studied for my upcoming certification test. Today's section what the history of modern quality assurance and the related responsibilities of management. W. Edwards Deming, one of quality's pioneers and one of the few names usually mentioned as responsible for guiding post-war Japan to extraordinary quality achievements in the 1970's, captured his guidelines in his famous 14 Points. A quick review shows that my former employer, known in this log as 'Porkus', has now achieved a stunning score of zero out of fourteen.

-- Opening day of T-ball practice found me playing catch, throwing grounders and in general running around barefoot in the green, green grass. It turns out that I can throw a baseball and also field. Who 'da thunk so?

--Later, I stopped by a used sports equipment store to look for a more broken-in mitt to help my five-year-old grab the ball a little better. She had to use the rest room. After standing for a couple of minutes by the register, I interrupted the clerk who was playing with the register and talking to his friend. He suggested that I take her to a store at the other end of the mall. I had a suggestion for him, threw the socks that I was planning on buying on the counter and left the store. It's probably a good thing that I hadn't been hauling along the bat that I had also been planning on buying. I read a wonderful remark that a customer gave in a similar situation: "You have a fundamental misunderstanding. You are overhead. I am profit."

-- I wore jewelry and a shirt with a lower V neckline. By "lower" I mean that it could be seen that I have a neck. For other Porkus refugees, you know what an emotional step in the sunshine that is. For those that haven't had the -- let us say -- "experience," the Porkus HR department has an aversion to breasts that starts at the collarbones. I lost a former assistant for wearing a shirt with a high V neckline and an art deco profile of the face of Marilyn Monroe. Apparently the mere suggestion of a blonde bombshell was enough to indicate the dreaded cleavage.

So what did I learn? I learned that I can be a brain, an athlete, a basket case, and a princess. Why does that sound so familiar?

I'm 80% of The Breakfast Club!


1 comment:

Corsair, The Mostly Harmless said...

"You have a fundamental misunderstanding. You are overhead. I am profit."

Oh, I LIKE that one. I'm totally stealing it for future use against the unwashed (seemily, anyway) hoards of pimply, self absorbed, and FAR too smug after-school specials who man the registers around here..

Turin Word: McKeno.
How McDonald's lures in the retirees and their gambling money..

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